When Does Breastfeeding Stop "Sucking" ?

[littlesunshine2]

I recall three weeks of horror and pain, to the point that my mum (who never bf any of her four kids) told me to give it up and start on formula. That was the biggest motivator, to proof to her that I could do. The next couple of weeks were hard but at around 16 weeks my dd rolled on her side and we both could happily lie down side by side; dd would drink, I would sleep. from that point it was easy. I bf her for nearly 21 months. I'm now pregnant again and hope that I'll have a similar experience with the second one.

 

[southside852]

I bfed my first for 4 months and it was the longest 4 months of my life. i can honestly said i dreaded doing it every day for 4 months. my milk also was delayed coming in b/c i was so stressed about it. it took a week after my son was born to have him latch on properly. i was at the hospital every day working with their lactation consultant. the entire time i bfed i was running on low battery and was so stressed about every feed. plus my first had reflux so we supplemented with formula. the day stopped nursing my first, felt like a huge weight had been lifted for both of us! it felt great!

i just finished nursing my 2nd after almost 6 months. i am actually so proud of myself for keeping with it this time. i didn't supplement with formula this time around and pumped 80% of the time and nursed directly 3 times a day. it was soooooo much easier for me the 2nd time around. i think i was just more relaxed and more confident in my parenting abilities. i felt like i knew how to nurse right from the start and i wasn't stressed.

i think for the majority of mothers, breastfeeding is really hard and requires perseverance and the belief that you can do it. No one tells you how hard it is and I applaud those who breastfeed for 1 week, 1 month or 1 year. It's all really amazing. No mother should feel guilty about not breastfeeding - it's not for everyone and some medically just can't.

 

[thanka2]

the day stopped nursing my first, felt like a huge weight had been lifted for both of us! it felt great!

Totally the same feeling!

It's all really amazing. No mother should feel guilty about not breastfeeding - it's not for everyone and some medically just can't.

And in my case, I'm the mother who also "mentally" couldn't do it.

 

[Biggie]

It was difficult with my first for the first 4-6 weeks. I also had low supply. Then I became more relaxed about supplementing with formula and baby was on half bf half formula.
Second baby is easier (3 mth old now). He latch on from day 1, only a bit of cracking nipple during first week. But still take me 6-8 week to establish supply. I think it's a combination of baby being better eater, and me being more experienced.
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[thanka2]

Good Article

 

[southside852]

I am also sadden when I hear stories of mother's who tell me other mothers look at them as if they are crazy for not breastfeeding or midwives who give them a look of disappointment when they decide to switch fully to formula or when they go to support groups for new moms and everyone is breastfeeding, but them. You should not be made to feel horrible for not breastfeeding during a time that is so overwhelming to begin with....Bringing a child into this world is a feat in itself. If not breastfeeding means you'll be a better mom, then so be it!

The bottom line is that no one knows your actual story for not breastfeeding whether it's medical, mental or it's just too hard. Tons of babies are formula-fed and are doing just fine .

 

[taysty]

Thank you southside852! What you said makes my day! I hope everyone or generally public thinks like you really.
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[Koan]

It took about 7 weeks. The first few weeks were truly horrible. I cried all day long and had toe curling pain the whole time he nursed, which was of course about 18 hours a day LOL! We had all the common problems, latch issues, engorgement, fatigue, baby blues, etc. It sucked. I desperately wanted to quit but knew that if I could get through the beginning it WOULD get better. Why else do people nurse for so long if it's that dreadful? My mother nursed me until I was 2.5 and always talked about it so happily so I knew it couldn't stay sucky forever.

And it didn't. This will pass and it will get better. You may not ever love it, but it won't hurt forever, it won't be hard work forever. And maybe, just maybe, you'll love it too! :lovedface:

Let me know if you need anything, thanka2. :grouphug:

 

[thanka2]

It took about 7 weeks. The first few weeks were truly horrible. I cried all day long and had toe curling pain the whole time he nursed, which was of course about 18 hours a day LOL! We had all the common problems, latch issues, engorgement, fatigue, baby blues, etc. It sucked. I desperately wanted to quit but knew that if I could get through the beginning it WOULD get better. Why else do people nurse for so long if it's that dreadful? My mother nursed me until I was 2.5 and always talked about it so happily so I knew it couldn't stay sucky forever.

And it didn't. This will pass and it will get better. You may not ever love it, but it won't hurt forever, it won't be hard work forever. And maybe, just maybe, you'll love it too! :lovedface:

Let me know if you need anything, thanka2. :grouphug:

But my experience is that it doesn't pass and it doesn't get better and all the expert advice and consultation doesn't help either (in my case, I mean--I know plenty of women who have been helped a lot by experts in this area). I mean, I put up with it and still had that toe-curling pain and discomfort for SIX MONTHS and I still kept with it because I told myself every day that it would get better and I kept asking for help and going to lactation consultants and doctors and we tried everything (probably things that most breastfeeding moms aren't even aware of) and it just never got better. So, I think I'm just one of those cases where breastfeeding might not be the best option.

The thing is that people who do nurse long-term are able to get over the physical problems within a reasonable amount of time (unless they're like me--stubborn and I guess a glutton for punishment in some ways as well). That's why I've given myself 8 weeks--it's a reasonable amount of time--and after that I have to go back to work full-time. From my past experience--stress isn't very conducive as well to breastfeeding/pumping so if the situation is still not working out I can't see myself stressing at work about it on top of the day-to-day stress of work. And especially not with an older child to take care of the same time. There is only so much one person can give before they really start to go crazy.

 

[nicolejoy]

You know with my 2nd, I was unable to nurse directly - for one, she was in NICU on a feeding tube for four months so she lost all her reflexes, even teaching her to drink from a special bottle which requires no sucking action was a huge chore! And for two, she has a cleft palate so she has very little suction as it is, definitely not enough to nurse. I made the decision to pump for her - and still I've had some people ask me "Why aren't you NURSING her!?!?!" (not really as a question, more as an accusation!!) - I can't believe the audacity of some people when they don't even KNOW the situation. I would have done ANYTHING to be able to nurse my 2nd daughter and I have made a HUGE commitment with pumping, but there are still people out there who want to make you feel guilty about it. Ignore them all, I say