Locals snapping pictures of my children?

[Gracey]

Howard -- I don't think it's hysteria. OK, maybe for some people, but not for most.

Mainland Chinese really do have a different sense of personal space --- and I say this as a Chinese person. Whether it's shoving you out of the way on a sidewalk, or reaching over to grab your newspaper out of your airplane seat, or sticking a camera literally two feet away from your face -- it's different even to Hong Kong, and different to most places in the world.

I always take photos when I travel -- and I don't think there's anything wrong if there's a family with kids in the background in a public space, like a park, that I am photographing.

But if I'm going to touch or go close up to someone's children (or even an adult), I ask first. Even if I don't speak the language, I will make eye contact and gesture at my camera if I'm going to zoom in on a street vendor, a local family, or whatever.

I've seen Chinese tourists pointing at, yelling at and grabbing at people's kids, or picking them out without even making eye contact with the parents. There is some lack of social etiquette -- they often don't smile or approach in a friendly way. It can be quite abrupt. Sometimes it's during rather private times, like when a family is sitting down to dinner at a restaurant. Of course, not all mainland Chinese are like this -- but if you spend much time in the more touristy parts of Kowloon, it is definitely a trend.

I don't know if I'd always see that as harmless curiosity, even if there was no ill intent.

 

[NewMommie]

To balance out all the negative stereotypes of mainland Chinese on here (and not saying people's experiences are not accurate at all, but of course they are still stereotypes), I wanted to relay an experience I had. During my pregnancy I have noticed that it is not that common for someone to get up and give me a seat on the MTR. I was traveling during the normal work hours, so these are able bodied professional men and women (western and local HK Chinese), and they would rarely if ever get up. Sometimes it was obvious they saw me and would pretend not to by staring down at a cell phone or blackberry. One day on a particularly uncomfortable ride there was a mainland Chinese man, wife and their daughter who clearly were visiting HK to check out Disneyland (the daughter had the mickey ears on). The husband took a look at me and smiled and stood up to offer his seat next to his wife and kid. I thanked them and they said, not at all, this is the right thing to do.

 

[Gataloca]

You are right, NewMommie. Once I went to GuangZhou, and used their MTR system. I was quite surprised to see how people would offer their seats to other people in need (e.g. lady carrying lot of bags)... Something not very common in HK.

 

[howardcoombs]

Howard -- I don't think it's hysteria. OK, maybe for some people, but not for most.

Lets split the difference and call it "many", ok ?

For those who are not paranoid and/or hysterical, they see "different" as you note below:

Mainland Chinese really do have a different sense of personal space --- and I say this as a Chinese person. Whether it's shoving you out of the way on a sidewalk, or reaching over to grab your newspaper out of your airplane seat, or sticking a camera literally two feet away from your face -- it's different even to Hong Kong, and different to most places in the world.

I agree with you 100%. They are different. They have their own customs and ways of doing things and many times, this clashes with sensibilities of non mainland Chinese people. They smoke and honk horns and hork up and spit and stare and touch and (I could go on and on)....

I don't know if I'd always see that as harmless curiosity, even if there was no ill intent.

This is the part I take issue with.
Just because they are different, different than yours and my culture, does not make them bad/wrong/harmful.
Mainland is not unique in this position.
You should listen to how:
- Americans talk about Mexicans
- Europeans talk about Americans
- French talk about the British
- Brits talk about the Germans
etc etc etc

 

[Gracey]

Howard -- None of us are here to debate the danger of stereotypes in general all over the world.

The thread is about a specific issue in Hong Kong: mainland Chinese tourists doing things that make people -- particularly young children and their parents -- uncomfortable.

I'm not sure what you mean by "my culture." I am Chinese. I have family on both sides of the border. Going up unannounced to a stranger's child and taking photos / touching / picking up without permission is bad behavior anywhere -- whether you're from China or Chile. If you walked up to a family on a crowded Beijing street and started touching and photographing a baby without permission, that Chinese parent would be upset, too.

I'm pretty easy-going, but this kind of behavior can be potentially dangerous. I saw a Chinese couple pick up a little Western girl at the airport and try to carry her away to the other side of the lounge -- the parents were furious. How are they to know if you're a Chinese tourist who just wants a photo, or a kidnapper?

Cultural differences or not, it's not right to barge up to strangers' kids and touch them or stick cameras in their faces with no warning. While staring, pointing and crowding around children is less alarming, it's still rude. Some young kids are afraid of strangers. Some families are quite private.

There are some universal codes of etiquette -- and mainlanders should not be exempt just because they're from China.

In the example you site, some tourists asked you -- an adult who can take care of himself -- to pose, and you said yes. There's nothing wrong with that.

Obviously, I'm not talking about casual travel photography, or grandma taking snapshots at a school play. I don't know what part of town you live in, but if you go to some areas of Kowloon with large numbers of Chinese tourists / recent immigrants, there is some behavior that is not very good at all.

 

[doudoub]

yes, i hate people taking pictures of my sweetheart without asking my permission!

 

[howardcoombs]

There are some universal codes of etiquette -- and mainlanders should not be exempt just because they're from China.

No such universal code exists.

Trying to enforce what you believe to be right/good/best upon a culture that is unfamiliar with that concepts will only result in frustration.

 

[Aviel]

It's quite annoying to see a stranger taking photos of your child. If I were you I wouldn't mind being offensive to such people. You read so many stories on the internet nowdays that you can't help feeling petrified by the sheer thought that something similar could happen to you