Advice Needed - I found my MIL very annoying

[carang]

i have truly tried not to let my occasionaly annoyance with my mil affect my kids' relationships with her. and it hasn't.

the way their faces light up and the way her face lights up when they see each other makes it worth my effort not to lose it when she drives me up the wall.

 

[rani]

BabyC, relationships with ILs can be very stressful. Hang in there. Just a thought, as you're working why don't you let yr MIL visit with baby when you're at work.

Then you can spend weekends alone with husband and baby.

 

[Frenchy]

You are not talking about your own parents, are they still alive, living close to you, coming to see you ? or is your MIL the only grand-parents your baby has ?

 

[BabyC]

thanks rani - that's what i am planning to do

i will ask my MIL to come during the weekdays instead after my maternity leave

 

[BabyC]

my parents are living very close and they come and visit baby very often. i love my parents come and visit

i just don't like my MIL's visit

 

[0ze_Kid]

No advice here but lots of suport. I too have to 'suck it up' often (which is not often enough - mmm).

 

[Little Monster]

but it is not a good idea to avoid meeting each other in a long run. You and your ILs are a one big family. they are the parents of your husband, you hv to learn to accept them as part of your family, just like the way you love your parents. I understand it is very annoying for them to give advice too much, coz this makes you feel that you are not capable in raising your own baby. This makes you feel that they know everything and you know nothing. I had been there. but they just wanted to help by sharing with you the actual experience they had before. sometimes their experience really helps.
Your MIL does not just have her grandson. She has her own son too. So, coming during the weekdays will sacrifice her right to meet with her own son too.
So, start to learn to love them as your family, and all will be happier.

 

[rani]

True. I don't know anyone who is BFF with their MILs. Everyone does the best they can to manage the relationship.

 

[kellyst]

I think some of it is in our head, but try to remember that whatever animosity you're feeling, you're the one who's hurting the most. Reading the above posts makes my MIL sounds like an angel, but she still annoys me here and there. BUT, I also realize that when I get annoyed with things that she does, I'm the one who's hurting most, and when I allow myself to let go and let loose, I'm the one who feels better. So I really try to let things go for my own sake.

Yes, getting them out of the house is a good tactic. Hubby and I get a date tonight while the kids are with MIL and FIL. It really is a win-win. They get to spend time, and I don't fret over what they do together.

 

[Neha]

babyc u say u find your MIL annoying but what has she done to annoy u so much. might be just that u dont like her and your mind is preset to dislike everything she does. Anyway as everyone else has said u either find a way to get along with her or ignore /avoid her and risk having issues with your husband. at the end the choice is yours.

Best of luck