Locals snapping pictures of my children?

[Frenchy]

It all depends on the situation, yes most of the time people are nice. If your level of acceptance is high enough to accept people grabbing your kid without asking you, or waking up your baby and make him cry, or take picture of your naked kids playing at the beach, good for you.
It's not about living here or somewhere else, it's about showing respect, and caring about what the parents think.

There is not ONE way to react, there is as many ways as there are some parents, and kids, and situations, as long as your react as a parent, with your feelings, positively or negatively, there is nothing wrong about that.

Also, what do you think of that guy who tried to snatch a 3 yo outside a kindergarden, and got stop by the supervisor. He explained he was just fond of children.
Is that just a "nice" guy, or a potential pedophile ?

 

[howardcoombs]

It all depends on the situation, yes most of the time people are nice. If your level of acceptance is high enough to accept people grabbing your kid without asking you, or waking up your baby and make him cry, or take picture of your naked kids playing at the beach, good for you.

Like I said, to each his own. Your level of tolerence is lower, and thats perfectly fine. You decide what is acceptable for you and your family.

It's not about living here or somewhere else, it's about showing respect, and caring about what the parents think.

This is the norm here. I wish you best of luck trying to change it.
You have your set of beliefs, values and norms. You are in a foreign land that has a different set.
Expecting them to change and bow to you is naive at best, arrogent at worst.
I strongly suggest you take some advice from St Ambrose :
si fueris Rōmae, Rōmānō vīvitō mōre; si fueris alibī, vīvitō sicut ibi

There is not ONE way to react, there is as many ways as there are some parents, and kids, and situations, as long as your react as a parent, with your feelings, positively or negatively, there is nothing wrong about that.

You are 100% correct.
All I'm saying is that it will happen, it will happen again. It will happen continuously as long as you take your kids out in public where there are some Chinese people.
By reacting your way, the only thing you are doing is increasing your own stress levels.
If you wish to continue to do that, then great. There is nothing wrong about that.

Also, what do you think of that guy who tried to snatch a 3 yo outside a kindergarden, and got stop by the supervisor. He explained he was just fond of children.
Is that just a "nice" guy, or a potential pedophile ?

I'm sorry, I dont know which guy you are referring to. What is his name? Could you please post a link to the story so I can read up some more about this person?

 

[Frenchy]

Who said I wanted to change it ? I'm living here for a few years now and love it here. But I'm not going to change who I am either, even though I have a great capacity to adapt to the different countries where I've lived.
Accepting some behaviours (in which children are involved) is different from understanding a whole culture (but that could make a whole other discussion...)

Showing some respect is a minimum (to me), and that's also what I'm teatching my kids.

Also, I consider having someone grabbing my kids without asking as a stressfull situation, and by saying no, I'm getting rid of this stress. Not the contrary.

About the link, I'm not good at looking the archives, but I'm sure lots of people have read about this guy, early this year, who was caught holding a little girl's hand, then tried to snatch a 3 yo outside a kindergarden. If I manage to get the link, I'll put it asap.

 

[PurpleFlower]

I remember reading something about it too and have just found the link in The Standard:

http://www.thestandard.com.hk/news_...2596&con_type=1&d_str=20110520&sear_year=2011

 

[howardcoombs]

Who said I wanted to change it ?

You did.
By expecting a whole culture to understand, accept and bow to your ways means they need to change.

I'm living here for a few years now and love it here. But I'm not going to change who I am either, even though I have a great capacity to adapt to the different countries where I've lived.
Accepting some behaviours (in which children are involved) is different from understanding a whole culture (but that could make a whole other discussion...)

Change or not is your choice.

Showing some respect is a minimum (to me), and that's also what I'm teatching my kids.

Who's version of respect did you want the Chinese population to show you? Your version? *smile*
Every culture has a different definition of "respect" and expecting the Chinese race to adapt to your version of respect is naive. You wishing they had your value system is arrogant.

Also, I consider having someone grabbing my kids without asking as a stressfull situation, and by saying no, I'm getting rid of this stress. Not the contrary.

In that case, you must be a very happy person and there is nothing further left to discuss about this situation.

 

[howardcoombs]

I remember reading something about it too and have just found the link in The Standard:
http://www.thestandard.com.hk/news_...2596&con_type=1&d_str=20110520&sear_year=2011

Clearly a disturbed person that needs professional help.
What does this, a kidnap attempt, have to do with people taking pictures?

 

[Frenchy]

Dear HC, you are putting things your way, but I'm sorry you got me wrong.

 

[Frenchy]

By the way, thanks PurpleFlower for the link !

 

[miran]

just to add on to the cultural angle that has come in - we have been asked a couple of times in stanley by "white" people if they could snap our son. We are south asians and brown They were from Germany and Ireland respectively before a socio economic discussion starts here

For me it's a very personal discussion. I have freinds who HATE anyone putting their kid's snap on FB. I respect that. On the other hand our friends were mobbed in Beijing coz of their then two year old son. They were ok with that. It's at the end of the day what you are personally comfortable with.

 

[erina320]

However, one must accept that we are living in Hong Kong and it is part of China (we are not in Europe nor in North America). Over here, it is very normal for people to take pictures of kids, touch them, cuddle them etc etc.
This is not strange, they are not pedophiles, they are not trying to kidnap the kids. They are just normal people treating children the way children are treated in this part of the world.

Howard- This statement is simply not true. As I stated in my original post if you try and take a picture of them or their children they shake their heads "No" and hustle away. In fact there was a case where my daughter was playing with a little Chinese girl in Tai O, everyone was happy and fine with the two of them playing until my husband tried to take a picture of the two of them playing and then the Mother ran and swept up her child as though we were trying to take her and said "No."

Also, if it is the cultural norm why can't I take pictures of my own children at the playground or swimming pool without someone stopping me?

I find it ironic that someone who keeps telling everyone else to "not stress about it" always seems to through themselves into the mix and acts an instigator.