Will you let your babies/children to play iPad?

I, personally, consider the term "moderation" to be a concept that applies over a length of time--so while some things I feel are not appropriate for my children under the age of 2-years-old (or whatever age) they might enjoy later. For me it's about boundaries. I consider it over the longer span of time I will be raising them so the statements do not conflict. So for me some things are "in moderation" which means at this point it's not okay but later, maybe. It's not a complete "ban" forever and ever amen. This is how we define a "moderate" view in our family. It's more of a far-looking, long-term approach, I think.

Your definition of moderation does not match the accepted definitions.
You are certainly not alone in your views but to call it moderation is a fallacy. You've chosen to ban something for a period of time and once that time has passed you will relax your rules.

You are the type of parent that bans things whether it be screen time, certain foods, certain shows(by your own admission).
I'm suspecting that your parenting style will continue into the later years with dating, sex, drugs, music, alcohol and other such challenges and you will be banning them until some arbitrary age.

I think it's important for me to identify when I think things are appropriate and when they're not. Just as I think it's not appropriate for my children to be drinking any soda at this age or watching violent cartoons I don't think it's appropriate for my children to be having screen time before they're 2-years-old and then after that it is extremely limited.
We are in agreement on the first part, however as soon as you put that "2 years old" in there which is an arbitrary and baseless number we diverge.

I'm trying to establish certain habits in my children's lives at a very young age (before they're 5-years-old especially). So, while there may not be actual "harm" to my children by having frequent "screen time" at these ages, it goes against what I'm trying to accomplish--the principles and habits I'm trying to establish in them.
I think decent parents everywhere try to instill good habits in their children's lives. You have chosen a time based strict approach.

Using drinking soda as an example, I don't allow my son to drink it at all and for this reason he has no real craving for it. He also doesn't prefer juice because we rarely drink this at home. So, if he's at a party and offered soda or juice he will often ask for water instead out of his own preference. He can't really "desire" what he isn't accustomed to having.
*smile* Surely you've heard of the forbidden fruit.
We dont have any bans in our house. We discourage certain things (processed foods, juices, etc) and have alternatives around the house. In the same direction, my kids have all tasted alcohol form a very young age (they all hate it), they have their own knives, they have all touched and played with a gun and have a healthy respect and have been educated in things.

I think this habit is a great start for him. Does that mean he won't have more freedom to choose these drinks later on? No. Does it mean that a sip of soda here and there is going to cause him to immediately have bad health? No. But, at the point when he starts to make those decisions for himself, my hope is that he'll already have a healthy habit established that will serve him well. Same thing with screen time. Just as I pointed out above--I prefer my children to see TV and computer time as a "treat" and something we do once-in-awhile--not the dependable go-to or mainstay of what we turn to when we're bored.
You can achieve your goals without banning and without the arbitrary age restrictions that a lot of people (and governments) choose to employ.
You can choose what you like and you can decide when its age appropriate, but surely nothing magical happens on the 2nd birthday just as nothing magical happens to someone on 19th or 21st birthday to make them ready for alcohol.
 
Your definition of moderation does not match the accepted definitions.
You are certainly not alone in your views but to call it moderation is a fallacy. You've chosen to ban something for a period of time and once that time has passed you will relax your rules.

So, who is writing these "accepted definitions." Your comment actually made me laugh a little because I imagined a computer with an error message when I read it. :smile:

You are the type of parent that bans things whether it be screen time, certain foods, certain shows(by your own admission).

You can choose to label me however you like but you know very little about my parenting except what I have shared here. Of course you can choose to extrapolate it however you wish--doesn't make it accurate or knowledge-based.

I'm suspecting that your parenting style will continue into the later years with dating, sex, drugs, music, alcohol and other such challenges and you will be banning them until some arbitrary age.

See above about extrapolation.

We are in agreement on the first part, however as soon as you put that "2 years old" in there which is an arbitrary and baseless number we diverge.

To you, it may be "arbitrary" but that's the label you put on it. You do not know my child and his development.

I think decent parents everywhere try to instill good habits in their children's lives. You have chosen a time based strict approach.

I agree with your first sentence. You have again labeled my approach as "strict" because it differs from your approach and is less "mainstream." That is your label. You really like to label and it seems like you pick me out to do so. It's easy to "label and dismiss" I think. Easy way to not have to really consider other people's views. Let's be fair...take a turn with another poster...they're probably feeling left out. :smile:

We dont have any bans in our house. We discourage certain things (processed foods, juices, etc) and have alternatives around the house. In the same direction, my kids have all tasted alcohol form a very young age (they all hate it), they have their own knives, they have all touched and played with a gun and have a healthy respect and have been educated in things.

Thanks for sharing about how you choose to raise your children. My children have both have sips of alcohol (yes, even the baby)--they will probably continue to enjoy alcohol as they get older as their father is an internationally certified mixologist (yes, you have to go to school to become one). My husband has a great knife and my 4-year-old will be getting a mini version for Christmas. It's probably not likely our children will play with guns as long as we live here but probably when they visit their grandparents they will learn to hunt and target practice when they're around 11-years-old. For us, there is a time and place for everything. That time and place will differ for everyone. It seems in your family that the time and place for most things is "now". :smile:

You can achieve your goals without banning and without the arbitrary age restrictions that a lot of people (and governments) choose to employ.
You can choose what you like and you can decide when its age appropriate, but surely nothing magical happens on the 2nd birthday just as nothing magical happens to someone on 19th or 21st birthday to make them ready for alcohol.

Again, you don't know my children or me (our personalities or how our family functions together)--you don't know why I chose 2-years-old or why I set any age limits for anything. I never said anything about "magical" numbers but we do know from studying child development that children do go through stages. They certainly don't start growing a beard when they're 5-years-old so I probably won't be giving my son a razor--that sort of thing.

And, the methods we use to raise our children are working really well for us. We are not at all harsh with our children and it's really a great system for us and for them. Our children are content, not over-stimulated, rested and our home is a tranquil place. This is the way we choose to do things. It is the way we prefer to do things and we don't find it to be a burden at all. If I do need input on the other way to do things, I will certainly remember to ask you.

Anyway, thanks for the chat. I think for me this conversation has run its course. There isn't anything more I can possibly say that will be of any more use here. Have a great weekend.
 
Your definition of moderation does not match the accepted definitions.
You are certainly not alone in your views but to call it moderation is a fallacy. You've chosen to ban something for a period of time and once that time has passed you will relax your rules.
So, who is writing these "accepted definitions." Your comment actually made me laugh a little because I imagined a computer with an error message when I read it. :smile:
Feel free to pick up any common dictionary or a computer to visit an online dictionary. The accepted definitions can be easily found within.

We are in agreement on the first part, however as soon as you put that "2 years old" in there which is an arbitrary and baseless number we diverge.
To you, it may be "arbitrary" but that's the label you put on it. You do not know my child and his development.
I know that your child as well as all children in this world do not magically change at the age of 2.


I think decent parents everywhere try to instill good habits in their children's lives. You have chosen a time based strict approach.
I agree with your first sentence. You have again labeled my approach as "strict" because it differs from your approach and is less "mainstream." That is your label. You really like to label and it seems like you pick me out to do so. It's easy to "label and dismiss" I think. Easy way to not have to really consider other people's views. Let's be fair...take a turn with another poster...they're probably feeling left out. :smile:
I labelled your approach as strict because it is. Again a dictionary would help you here.
Actually, your approach *is* mainstream; the world is full of parents like you. I just happen to disagree with that particular approach.
I pick you out because you come up with some really doozie comments from time to time that get me passionate enough to disagree with in public.

And, the methods we use to raise our children are working really well for us. We are not at all harsh with our children and it's really a great system for us and for them. Our children are content, not over-stimulated, rested and our home is a tranquil place. This is the way we choose to do things. It is the way we prefer to do things and we don't find it to be a burden at all. If I do need input on the other way to do things, I will certainly remember to ask you.
Thats good to hear. Happy kids, happy families and all that.

Anyway, thanks for the chat. I think for me this conversation has run its course. There isn't anything more I can possibly say that will be of any more use here. Have a great weekend.
Likewise :gmilk:
 
Likewise :gmilk:

Why, yes I do. Do you? Ha ha ha ha! Fortunately, I don't live my life "by the dictionary" (thank God!). Wouldn't that be funny, "Okay, I'd better look at Webster's and make sure I'm thinking/acting/doing what the books says I should." No, I much more prefer to think for myself and make decisions for my children that way. A lot less confining that way. Not watching TV and letting your child play with an iPad is mainstream? Wow! The mainstream has changed a lot! Thanks for the update! Okay, enough of that. I'll just shake my head and walk away.
 
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Fortunately, I don't live my life "by the dictionary"
If you use it a bit more often, you will choose more appropriate words.

"Okay, I'd better look at Webster's and make sure I'm thinking/acting/doing what the books says I should."
Alas, Websters doesnt show that but it does will tell you what moderate and arbitrary mean.

No, I much more prefer to think for myself and make decisions for my children that way. A lot less confining that way.
Thats good because I'm not aware of any dictionary that can help you with your kids decision making. Help with your vocabulary, yes - kids, dont think so.

Not watching TV and letting your child play with an iPad is mainstream? Wow! The mainstream has changed a lot!
No actually, mainstream hasn't changed that much. Setting arbitrary rules like "before age X is not allowed, after is OK" has been used by parents for generations. You happen to call this "moderation" which I find humorous.

Thanks for the update! Okay, enough of that. I'll just shake my head and walk away.
:welcome:
 
ding ding ding.... opponents, to your corners... end of round 1309878....

;)

(i'm just glad it's not me discussing/arguing this time round! mark the day on your calendar... today, Cara did NOT argue with anyone online...)
 
As a side thought.... Is it possible to set up a poll to ascertain if there are differing/similar/opposing reports coming from working and stay at home parents? I'm not sure how to do it, thanks
 
Old thread, but relevant issue. I think tv is not recommended for under 2y olds as it is supposed to inhibit language development, acquisition of new words.
For iPads, I have seen screaming toddlers as mummy abruptly takes away the ipad as the plane is coming to land, having been happy to issue it, as soon as the flight started.
I would not recommend it for preschoolers, myself. There is more than enough time for computer skills to be developed during childhood.
Its for the parents benefit, I think, not the child.
 

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