Parents beware of their maid

[ELT]

We recently took our baby to Philippines for a short vacation. We took him everywhere we went. We couldn't go clubbing at night or smoke or stay out too late but we thought that's what parents do -- plan holiday and activities around the kid once become parents. We were married for 9 years before we decided to have this baby. We never expected life would be the same once we have a new addition to the family.

I can't imagine trusting my baby with a hotel baby sitter not because for fear that the hotel baby sitter would snatch him. It is just that babies are delicate and I would want to be sure whoever is handling him has the skills and patience. A hotel baby sitter is not like the nanny at home who knows his moods and how to sooth him when he is distressed. Also, I don't think the baby would want to be with someone he is not familiar with. Besides, if my hubby and I had to go to a dinner having to worry what's going on with the baby in the hotel room, might as well take him with us. If the restaurant is not baby-friendly, then we'll just pick another place.

Well, it is not my business how other parents want to spend their holidays. You may also argue that the same could happen at school. I am not writing this to judge anyone. I am just expressing my opinion, that I would not leave my baby to a stranger or unattended in a hotel room. No, I can't watch him 24/7 but I would do the best I can to prevent the obvious risks.

 

[rani]

Why is it extraordinary to use a babysitter in a hotel? Do you really sit in with the children all night, every night? Or do you now use hotels? Or you you take your helper?

I've never used a sitter in a hotel either. After D goes to bed, we both catch up on our reading, or watch a bit of tv with the volume on low. When he was a baby, we'd take him with us for dinner and he'd fall asleep in his stroller.

 

[aussiegal]

The hotels we use all have very strict policies on who can babysit on their premises. You must use one of their recommended agencies and though the fees are quite high they are worth it as they have screened every candidate. We've always found the babysitters to be great. Most of the time they are women in their fifties. For the most part I'd rather leave my kids with them than my own mother who doesn't have much a maternal instinct shall we say...

I agree though that when you have kids you just accept that life has changed and the kids come first. We're happy to have our days revolve around the kids but have also appreciated a night out when travelling. We were just in New York for what was my first time and couldn't imagine not going out at night at least a couple of times during the stay. That would be sacrilege. Fortunately the babysitter was so good we didn't worry at all. We've kept her number for when we go back!

 

[aldougie]

For all those sitting in judgement of the McCann's - they have to live with their decision for the rest

 

[aldougie]

Sorry posted before I finished! They have to live with their decision for the rest of their lives. I stayed at this resort last year, infact a couple of apartments down from where Maddie was taken. It isn't a hotel as you imagine with 100's of people traipsing past every day. It is a quiet street, with the apartments set well back from the road, screened by trees at the front (which unfortunately was why they were able to take her as they came through the front bedroom window I believe forcing the screen). The apartments are a mixture of holiday lets and people living their permanently and the McCann's would have been able to see the back patio window to their apartment from the Tapas bar. Contrary to what Mark Warner have said it was difficult to get a babysitter and their sitting service was rubbish - taking and dropping off was not an option for us as it would have completely messed up their sleep patterns. We didn't leave our kids as they aren't good sleepers but for years people have done this using baby monitors - my parents certainly left us when we were little using hotel listening services.

The McCann's were lulled into a false sense of security because of the family friendliness of the place and the fact they were so close to where their children were. I have nothing but pity for them as this was a judgment call that many people have taken but for them it has had horrific consequences.

 

[aussiegal]

Yes they do. I feel sorrier for Maddy however.