Missing the family...

I'm kind of half half. I love my family and have a great relationship with them and miss them like crazy - but I think it's been good for all of us since we've been over here. It's only been 3.5 years though so maybe it'll get worse later ;) I don't cry when I talk to them or when I put them on the plane to go home. Sometimes I'm even relieved ;) the living space is so tight here that it seems like it's easier to tread all over each others toes.

The hardest times for me is during pregnancy. Particularly this pregnancy, with all the issues going along with it... looks like chances are, we might have a bub with special needs. I think that if that happens, it might end up accelerating our plan to go back to Australia just because the culture here I think is not as good for people who are "different"...

I actually have mixed feelings about going back though. On one hand I can't wait, but on another hand it marks the end of a journey and I really have enjoyed my time here in HK and I know it's been good for us as a family. I'll miss it a lot when we move back!!
 
Seeing people who have longed to go home then wanted to come back again is a bit confusing to me. What would you miss about HK? I'm not complaining here but I simply enjoy the layback kind of lifestyle a lot more in Australia. The space, beautiful sunny days and clear blue sky and sea water and the white-sanded beaches...I can only trade all these away for a limited number of years , knowing I would definitely go back some day.

I feel a lot more settled now that I have a full time job to keep my mind occupied. I have blended in quite well with my collegues and met a few local or foreign friends, and I even managed to pick up Cantonese. However, I'd always be looking forward to moving back some day.
 
my problem is that i have now been here for pretty much my entire working life (came here right out of uni when i was 22 yrs old)...

i look forward to the day we move back to canada, but to be honest, the idea also terrifies me.

hk, i know. i know what business ideas will succeed. i know many of the ins and outs. i know where to buy stuff. i know how to get about. i have friends here.

i also know that the canada i left is not the canada that is there now. friends have gone on with their lives, and i've not been a part of them. when i go back for a holiday, everyone makes a point of getting together, but that is because i'm not a major part of their lives. i'm only there for a few days, then i'm gone again. the city where i grew up has had a population explosion... since i've been gone, about 30,000 more people have moved there. i have a difficult time finding my way around. besides, my mum and brother have both moved away, so if we do go back, it won't be to my hometown...i'll have to start all over again from scratch.

for those of us long-timers, it's completely different from those that have only been here a couple of years.
 
I'm not a long-timer, only been here for 3.5 years... but I'll miss people from over here, I'll miss the transportation system, I'll miss the sushi!! A lot of restaurants. We eat out a lot over here. I do think that wherever you live, it becomes a part of yourself... and HK is the place where my daughter was born, where I've gone through a whole lot of stuff and really grown as a person... so in that way, when I move back I'll feel like I'm leaving a part of myself here...
 
Carang, I absolutely understand you. You've settled down here and HK is your home. You've worked everything out, including moving away from the city to Saikung to enjoy the space and greenery etc. And also for those who truely enjoy the fast-paced, exciting and vibrating lifestyle of HK, they feel like they are in heaven. I sincerely feel happy for you.

That's why I don't want to stay here for too long. As Carang said, back home things are changing fast too. We'd feel like a complete stranger if we had left it for too long. Especially finding a job could become an issue again. Even we can save a lot faster here with the low tax etc, I sometimes ask myself: how much is enough? Is it really worth what we're giving up, ie. the space, the clean air, and a much more relaxed educational system for the kids? I don't think so.

That's why we must go back. However I would forever appreciate the opportunity of having lived and worked in HK, and having the chance to broaden our experience and horizon.
 
Monty - isn't it ironic? We long to see our families but when it comes to saying goodbye, it's the hardest thing. I remember hiding in the AEL toilets to cool off my eyes with a wet tissue when I saw my mum off a few years ago. And when I say goodbye at Sydney airport, I must look really stupid going across customs with swollen red eyes.

Like another poster said, it's hard to see parents age and it's harder not being able to spend time with them. My parents are pretty understanding about things and don't spell it out for me to go home but I know damn well its what they want. It must be hard for them when their friends all have grandchildren visiting on weekends etc. I love the convenience of HK, feeling 'safe' being out at midnight(compared to Sydney anyway), and like Carang said, we know how to 'play the game' after being here for so long. But now that I have a child, I want him to have what I had as a child because my childhood is still something I boast about. A lot of people I know who grew up here can't say the same, which I think is a real shame.

It's amazing how much some of us have in common!
 
Wow. This thread has made my day... in the sense that, I FEEL EXACTLY THE SAME WAY. We've moved to Beijing now after 7 years in HK. When I moved from Canada to HK, it was a culture shock, but I wasn't a mother yet. Now I'm a mother so moving to BJ with a 3 month old, and staying at home with her has been extremely stressful. My husband is local Chinese from near Beijing and so, my mother-in-law is staying with us to help out. MIL living with us is stressful... but that's another story.

I miss my family more than ever and am thinking about every day how I'd love for them to know their grandchild more. The Internet has done wonders for us though. I actually think she recognizes them a bit now.. :)

I also miss Canada more than ever, ... although I've told my hubby I will settle with HK if we have to stay in Asia. But in my heart, I really want my children (or "child" for now) to be able to ride their bikes around the block, run through the sprinklers, go to the many many parks with lots of green grass and a blue sky.
 
@ Carang, I understand you completely. Many of my high school friends (all Asian) are in HK now, and our HK group is bigger than our Vancouver group! I also wonder if Canada would still be a good fit for me now...
 
i still have the pangs of homesickness. but i find that when a new challenge presents itself, the homesickness eases quite a bit. i'm in the middler of opening a new playgroup centre and i've just found out that my two teachers at my current centre are leaving... coupled with my helper moving to canada about 6 weeks ago, helping my husband with his business, i just don't have time to think about it so much lately. which is good because it was getting so bad, it hurt.

i'm a little disappointed because i was planning on taking the kids back for a month during the summer, but it doesn't look like it will work out... too much going on, i'm afraid.
 
Carang, keeping busy is definitely good. Being a stay-at-home mom right now in a new place with a 7 month old is definitely taking its toll. If I were working, I wouldn't be able to do a 3 month home visit which I am planning now. So I feel lucky. We are not, by any means, wealthy... I chose not to work actually because I didn't want my MIL taking care of my daughter full time. I saw what "damage" (and I use this word very loosely) can be done. So I sacrificed my own career I took so long to build. :( C'est la vie. I get told it will pay off... I hope so.

As she approaches one year, I think I will be on the lookout for business/career opportunities that allow flexibility. If we're going to go back to Canada, we need money!!

I love this thread. Vent vent vent.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.

About this archive

This is an archive of over 20 years of GeoBaby and GeoSchools knowledge and discussions, kept online as a read-only reference.

Back
Top