Language Confusion for 16mth old

[merryma]

Glad to see this multilingual thread!

My boy is 14month-old now. As of now, since birth, I have been speaking to him in ONLY English, my husband, and my parents-in-law visit frequently speak ONLY Cantonese, the helper speaks Malay. I wanted to introduce Manadarin too, but thought to stick to the widely believed one-person-one-language theory. Eventually I'd definitely want him to pick up Mandarin too, just the matter of how to start introducing it and when...

I was a full-time working mom until 2.5 months ago. So, he was exposed to Malay (with my helper) most of the time. Now that I am staying home all day with him, English has become more like his main language, next comes Malay and Canto.

I have a few questions, and hope you share your thoughts: :thanks

1: Despite I speak ONLY English to him, but I speak other languages to others with his presence (Eg., Canto with my hubby and parents-in-law, Malay with my helper). I am not sure if this is doing any harm?
Any moms doing this too?


2: May I know those in more than 2 or 3 languages with the kids, when do your kids start talking?? (utter words properly, trying to put in short sentense)

Look forward to hear from you moms...
Cheers,

 

[somebodyfamous]

Well I'm half Chinese and half English and my parents spoke to each other in English and it has not impaired me or any of the other Eurasian kids I knew growing up in the same situation..... So presumably it wont affect our children 'negatively'

 

[saun-mom]

My understanding from the scientists that study language development is that children that grow up in a bilingual (or trilingual) environment are almost always delayed in starting to speak, but end up catching up just fine.

You can google language development bilingual, or bilingual language delays, or similar search terms, and you'll probably turn up some interesting articles.

Sadly, we're boring old English speakers, and our kids are struggling with Mandarin (not even attempting Cantonese yet)- be glad you've got all the skills to give your kids the benefit of multiple languages!

 

[somebodyfamous]

i dont think my girls talked late at all!!

 

[carang]

my son did. i don't think he talked full, proper sentences until he was almost 3. my daughter has been talking in full proper sentences since she was 21 months....

 

[OX Jess]

I speak only English to my son whilst my hubby & all relatives speak Cantonese. My son is now 9 months old and he can understand some words in English, e.g. Water (he opens his mouth), Music (he looks at the hi-fi), Shake-Shake (he shakes his hand). In my & my hubby's family, apart from my sister-in-law, nobody speaks English to my son. The only chance for my son to be exposed to English is when he is with me or with my sister-in-law and when I take him out to see my English-speaking friends. The community language is Cantonese so I don't worry about his development in Cantonese/Chinese as it will be his mother-tongue (despite his mom speaking English to him). Will he mix up with English & Cantonese? I don't know yet but I am confident that he can manage (or at least understand) two languages even if, as I have well prepared, he may refuse to "speak" the minority language English. I am told by experts that as long as your kids has 'passive' understanding of a language, you don't need to worry too much whether they speak it or not. When they realise there is a need to speak it, they will and they can. Hmmm.. hope the experts are right. I am however very anxious to see the language development in my son who is being raised in such an "imbalanced" bilingual environment and I hope I can have more mums in the same boat to share their experience & views.

 

[carang]

oxjess, my kids have been in an imbalanced environment as well...however, ours is slanted towards the english. (even though hubby tries to speak chinese...) i have found that in order for my son to actually want to speak chinese, i had to send him to a chinese kindergarten.

now, he has full-on conversations with his "ma ma" (grandma) about stuff that i can't even tell what they are talking about. HE'S the translator for me! what a difference 6 months can make~

 

[Tini]

My son is now 27months old and grows up trilingual. I speak exclusively German to him, Daddy speaks English and Grandparents speak Cantonese. He understands all three languages and picks up words from all three. His speech development is delayed, so is in all multilingual children, that's normal. But he is catching up more and more now. He only needs to hear a word once and says it immediately. It is important though that you keep it clear to the child who speaks which language and be consistent, otherwise they will get confused. Kids are naturals in regards to language so enjoy them becoming especially smart

 

[lesliefu]

this is an interesting thread...just attended a conference on bilingualism and language acquisition yesterday and how some interesting findings to share...according to research:

1) Bilingual children will have a delay in speech, however, this delay is not something to worry about in the longrun as it does not impair their cognitive development. because they have a smaller vocab. in each of the languages they speak / listen to, it just takes them longer to get started...if you know what I mean.
2) bilingual children are supposedly better off since the two languages helps in their cognitive development in the long run - they will be better able at solving two tasks, because they are constantly doing that from a young age already...deciding which language to use and what means what in what language....
3) bilingualism actually provides the foundation for attention, and early bilingualism has a profound effect on language and cognitive development. though there are some language delays (which are insignificant in the long run) research shows that bilingualism shapes development of a child.
4) actually there is a book - The Bilingual Child by Veronica Ip and Stephen Matthews, that talks about not having to have one parent speak one language to avoid confusion, but rather ensuring that the environment is sound for language usage. their point being that you can never actually give your kids 50/50of each language, some days you will have more or less of each language and so long as the kids are exposed to it, they will learn.

Finally, for parents worried about language delays (I'm one!) receptive language is much easier to learn than expressive language. in order to be able to express oneself, you need to be exposed to the word / vocab at least 12 times before it can be remembered by the learner (any learner), more importantly though, the 12 times needs to be in context so that there is meaning associated with it, rather than it just being a single word that has literally "fallen from the sky"...

So....just talk more and read more stories is at least what I'm doing...my daughter definitely understands more than she can express, I'm getting feedback...unfortunately not in anything understandable though (well, understandable to me only)....

Good luck to you all!

 

[OX Jess]

Yes, Cara, I think if you WANT your kids to speak Chinese, the only way to get it achieved is by sending them to a local kindergarten where your kids are surrounded by local kids speaking the local language. I wonder, if your husband speaks ONLY Cantonese to your kids and you English, they will at least understand Cantonese even if they refuse to speak it, won't they?!? Kids are smart (and lazy of course) - they know whether there is a need or not for them to speak the language and they will pick an easy way. Having heard so many stories from bilingual families, I know I have to prepare myself for one day very soon my son will answer me in Cantonese despite a question posed in English by his mum. He does it simply because he knows his mum can understand Cantonese! As far as I know, kids are clever enough to tell what language is what when they reach around 3 - the problem you have to deal with is whether they are willing to speak 2 or 3 languages as much as you want them to.
One question: as your kids are raised in English environment, how did they feel/cope when you sent them to a local kindergarten? Were they happy from day one?

Tini: Are there anyone apart from you speaking German to your son? What language,among 3 language, your son is particularly good at? Which language your son is exposed to the most since he was born? I work full time 5 days a week so on weekdays I can only speak to him an hour in the morning then another hour in the evening. He is exposed to Cantonese most of them time except on the weekends when I am with him all day. That's why I am surprised with so much joy to note my son understands some English words as I mentioned earlier... )