How to handle strangers touching your baby?

[Mingaling]

My baby is very active and friendly. When we take her outside, she smiles and coos at people and I am assuming people find this as an invitation to touch her. I can stop people half of the time, but others, they grab a foot or a hand so fast that I don't realize until its too late.

I started putting socks on my baby so at least her feet are covered, but I have no idea what to do about her hands. I have also experienced a waitress touching my baby's cheek! Is this behavior standard and appropriate in HK? Where I am from, it's never appropriate to touch someone's baby without the parents permission.

I am sort of a germaphobe (especially now with a baby), any suggestions on what I can do to prevent this from happening?

 

[Pandy]

I usually pull my baby back, or tell them baby has cream on their hands/face to avoid face touching! A friend had his baby's cheeks pinched by a stranger, so he pinched that persons face back. Safe to say they didnt like it!!

 

[Mingaling]

Pandy - do you pull your baby back when strangers approach (even before they reach out to touch)? I kinda want to do that, but I don't want to be rude either. I hate it when strangers are that close to my baby.

That's hilarious! It will teach them not to touch (or pinch!).

My husband thinks I am overreacting.

 

[Pandy]

Usually baby is in his carrier so its easier to pull back. Strangers touching his face or hands is a no no. Feet or squeezing his arms I dont mind so much.

 

[Mingaling]

My baby sucks her toes so its a no-go for me. We are regulars at this restaurant and the wait staff sees my baby regularly and they take it upon themselves to squeeze her hand or feet when we walk by. Drives me nuts!

We use a carrier as well, the stroller we have has been sitting in our living room unused. Strollers are not really convenient in HK - wish we thought about that before buying it.

 

[Pandy]

Yes! My husband just sold our new stroller the other day for that reason. It's a big pain in built up areas but I imagine useful if living in NT or if drive.

 

[2010-NewDad]

You'll have a lot less stress if you get used to it. It's a different culture over here and everyone loves an adorable baby.

Unless your child is distressed or uncomfortable, there is no issue anyway - apart from parental hangups. Germs - well that's how our immune system gets trained up and our children pick up hundreds of times more germs from the environment than they ever will from someone touching them.

It used to bother me, now unless my children are upset by it I generally let it slide.

 

[Mingaling]

Newdad- for me, it's more about personal space and crossing boundaries. I wouldnt approach a stranger and grab their hand or feet, or pinch a cheek, and I wouldnt want someone doing it to me. Why should a baby be any different?

Germs is also a factor, I rather not add to the germs my baby has to encounter. She already puts everything in her mouth.

And yes, I agree - i find that this culture loves an adorable baby. But what culture doesn't?

 

[carang]

i am with NewDad on this one..... it's part of the culture here, they are doing it with good intentions. they are not trying to hurt/harm you or your baby, and sorry, but it is a bit of an over-reaction, in my opinion.

and yes, strangers do come up and touch you. they shake hands etc, no?

 

[Mingaling]

Carang - no, on a day to day, strangers do not come up to me and shake my hand. And IF they do, I have no intention of putting that hand in my mouth. My baby will.