Crying all the way to work

[Gataloca]

Kind of a pointless thread, but my hubby said last night that he cannot stand my cats anymore. That will send them to SPCA on the weekend. He said he is tired of his cloth covered with cat hair, and don't want cat hair around the baby, when he arrives.

My cats are very dear to me, specially the black girl. I took her from some kids from the neighborhood when she was a kitty, and by that time I was living (and feeling) alone in the US. When I moved to HK to marry my hubby, I was very thankful that he allow me to bring her with me. Now she is almost 10 year old.

I felt so bad, because I have read that in the SPCA, if they cannot re-home your pet in a period of time, they would put it to sleep... Most people don't like black cats, specially would not adopt a 10 year old one. And about the other one, although he is younger (4 year old) and is a handsome Scottish fold, I don't know if it would be easy to be re-homed, as I saw that there are lot of Scottish fold waiting to be re-homed from other shelters....

Anyway, later last night, my hubby apologized and told me to forget what he said. But I know it is not over. It is not the first time he wanted to get rid of the cats. And we are still in a dilemma, as we need to renovate our place to make room for the baby, but he still hasn't started anything because of the cats.

So this morning was crying all the way to work. Just couldn't think of anything else. Eyes are watering, red and swollen, nose are stuffed.... well, at least I can say I got seasonal allergy, if anyone ask....

 

[TheQuasimother]

Gataloca

I feel for you. Our cat has travelled across seas with us. And we would never give him away. It's a common joke in our family that he's our first son.

We have been looking to adopt a cat. If you are forced to re-home them, please get in touch with me. Or, try HKAlley Cats instead of SPCA. I think they are more humane.

Cheers!

 

[louisouis]

sorry to hear about that, it is rather common in HK, when pet owners are forced to give up their pets due to pressure from their 'well-meaning' friends and relatives. I also have a cat, an exotic short hair, who sheds all the time regardless of seasons, the key to this is constant cleaning of the floors (when I did not have a full time helper, I had a part time helper come in and clean the floors 3 times a week) and contant grooming for the cats. I have not brought my cat to be groomed for the longest time as i was paranoid that he will catch cat flu, but i just brought him last week... and viola! Less shedding! Good luck! I am sure you will be able to work this out.

 

[0ze_Kid]

Sorry to hear your delima. Maybe you could try and rehome one of the cats now as you know the issue will come about again. This way you are showing that you are working on the issue. He may be more willing to tolerate 1 cat (I know mine DH is, he hates cats!) than 2.

I know it is a tough choice but this way you can do it yourself instead of sending them to the SPCA where you do not know the outcome.

Advertisie on all the forums you know and include some cute pictures. Put them both up and then keep which ever one can not be rehomed.

Good luck with it.

PS: you may even be able to arrange play dates with the Cat's new home if you do it yourself.

And there is lots of evidence based articles about how a cat and a baby can live together. Google some and leave them lying around the house for DH to skim over.

 

[Gataloca]

Thanks a lot for your words, ladies.

I have contacted both LAP Lifelong Animal Protection Charity and HK Alleycat, and seems that they both can accept my cats. But still, it is so hard to surrender them... I still don't want to do it.

Quasimother, here is a pic of my 4 year old Scottish fold. He is quite a maniac sometime. He is very sweet, and likes to follow me everywhere sometime, but get easily jealous of my other cat. He would then chase her and bite her hair off (other reason why we have so much cat hair on the floor). He also got a scratching addiction since he developed a bad case of ear mite several years ago. Although we took him to the vet several times, they couldn't find the root of his problem. Now he still scratch his ears, face, neck a lot, which cause lot of shedding (and I have been brushing him everyday and cleaning his ears every week).... I don't know if you would like such a trouble cat.

 

[OX Jess]

I feel for you Gataloca as I am facing the similar problem as you, but I guess my situation is a bit better than you because my husband is not 'that' hostile to my cats, although he has expressed strongly his annoyance over everywhere of the cat sand and furs and his worries over the allergies possibly triggered by cats to to our baby son (9 months - he sneezes now and again then my husband blames this on my cats). I have been keeping my two cats for nearly 6 years, before even I met my husband so my stance, on the one hand, is very firm, "I can't remove my cats just because you have entered into my life! Instead you have to learn to adjust yourself...blah blah blah." But on the other than, I know I have to bear with the fact that, I really cannot make someone, who is genuinely not a cat lover to love my cats as much as I do. Of course I am not happy, but I have to find a balance and try to make peace.

Before my son is born, he has no problem with the cats at all, although he is NOT a cat lover but he knows I love them so he cares for them.

We moved into a 3-bedroom flat as soon as our son is born and my cats are now locked in one bedroom which is also a room for my husband's wardrobe and few household items. Me & my husband have reached a so-called 'agreement' - I won't let my cats out whenever he's at home.. he doesn't care if he can't see!

Instead of giving your cats away, do you have a spare room in which you can put your cats there like the situation in my household?

 

[carang]

does your husband know that children raised with animals are LESS likely to develop allergies than those NOT raised with them?

(coming from someone who currently has 17 dogs downstairs and 7 rabbits~incl 4 newborn babies...anyone want a rabbit?)

 

[OX Jess]

Cara, I've given all these information to my husband already!!! If he chooses not to be convinced and believes that my son's sneeze is related to the cats, what else can I say? More arguments because of the cats? He knows I'd be heartbroken if the cats are being sent away (which is one of his biggest wishes!!!) so I must say, he is tolerating me... and I am also tolerating him. Haha...

 

[Gataloca]

Thanks OX Jess. Actually my hubby is not that "hostile" toward my cats. He does the litter changes, takes them to the vet, orders the cat food, even play with my scottish sometime, when one of the vet said that his problem may be just boredom (he is actually afraid of cats and never pet them though).

He just get so stressed out sometime, specially when he find his clothes covered with white cat hair, or when he thinks about the renovation of our place. We wanted to do that long time ago, and even found temporally places where we could stay. However, later we got rejected because of the cats. That disappointed my hubby a lot. He said that if it weren't because of the cats, we could simply go to a serviced apartment.... We didn't like the idea of putting the cats into a boarding place either.

So in my case, the solution would not be as simple as hiding the cats...

 

[Gataloca]

Cara, I've given all these information to my husband already!!! If he chooses not to be convinced and believes that my son's sneeze is related to the cats, what else can I say? More arguments because of the cats? He knows I'd be heartbroken if the cats are being sent away (which is one of his biggest wishes!!!) so I must say, he is tolerating me... and I am also tolerating him. Haha...

... Yes, it is like convincing mine that what is sometime on his clothes are dust and small fibers from threads, and not cat hair. He is convinced that there is not such thing as dust in his apartment, because there isn't any construction site near. So all the dirty particles come from the cat and the litter.