Baby boy- circumcision?

[barbwong_130]

It is a tough decision on boy's anatomy - so I delegated this to the daddy.

It is a tough decision ? so why not leave it to your son (whose body it is) rather than the father?

It is a procedure that you can have at any time in your life. It isn?t necessary to make the decision and carry it out while your son is a baby. I know of two friends who had the operation as adults because they wanted it (both for religious reasons).

After all your can?t have an operation to give your foreskin back if when you grow up you deicide you?d rather not be circumcised. And if you don't think that could happened -read about it at NORM, National Organization of Restoring Men, http://www.norm.org/

 

[carang]

it didn't even enter our minds to have it done. i wasn't concerned with what trends were or anything, and it wasn't a religious thing either.

i just couldn't imagine putting a helpless newborn through it, especially if it isn't necessary for a happy life.

i have other friends though that have chosen to have it done.

it's a very personal decision that only you and your husband can make.

good luck!

 

[ashlea]

I think all the posts on this are from women so I thought I would put a man's point of view (Ashlea is my baby's name - I am Hullexile on geoexpat).

I was circumcised when a baby no for religious reasons and as far as I am aware not for health reasons either.

I have read stuff on how it causes psychological harm due to not being complete. All I can say is that I have never experienced that, quite happy with what I've got. Secondly it causes a lot of pain - well I don't remember the experience but I don't seem to be traumatised by it. We had our baby daughter's ears pierced at birth, probably just as painful. Thirdly it causes sexual problems due to insensitivity - well I do take longer than average to climax but most women don't complain about that.

A final point, most women seem to find a circumcised member more aesthetically pleasing, you don't find many dildos looking like uncircumcised penises.

Its up to you obviously but all I am saying is that I would not put too much weight on all the horror stories and I doubt your son will grow up hating you for doing it (or not).

 

[clowe77]

Hi Ashlea (or Hullexile)

I laughed when reading your message, not because circumcision is a laughing matter but because I appreciated the truth in what you said. Thanks for giving us a man's perspective.

My husband is Canadian and circumsized and suffice to say I agree with all of your comments. We've having a son in April 08 (our first) and we plan to have him circumsized. Where I come from (the US) and in Canada, this is very common for hygiene reasons. It makes perfect sense to me that foreskin can trap bacteria and be the cause of hygiene/health issues later in life. As for the stuff you hear about the psychological damage (feeling a part of him missing), I have yet to hear a man complain about that. And most guys I knew growing up (friends, lovers, family) were circumsized and perfectly complete and normal in every way.

 

[barbwong_130]

It was not my intention to suggest that psychological problems were a likely outcome from circumcision but a possibility ? even if very rare.

I?m not surprised that people haven?t heard men complain about this side of circumcision and your reply is exactly the reason why. Who would wish to bring up a subject where you are likely to be ridiculed and assumed to be less of a man? I know quite a lot of men and some every well but only one well enough to discuss such intimate personal details with. I don?t think I could even bring this subject up with my brother.

Would you be so quick to dismiss a mother?s feelings that she felt a failure because her birth had ended in a cesarean?

 

[JANE892]

Wow I certainly got some great replies. Thanks to everyone who contributed.
I've done some reasearch and it seems that the trend to do this in Australia is decreasing at an astonishing rate...something like only 10% of boys are done (QLD is the state with the most boys done being 20%). It's important to me that my son looks like his friends...I think thats important to kids.
My husband is still very concerned about the hygiene factor...but really it shouldn't be an issue these days...
I guess I'm just happy to let my son (if I even have a boy) make up his own mind about his own body... or if there is a medical reason he needs it done then of course I wouldn't object if and when the time came.
I think I've come to my decision but my husband is still on the fence. So we'll see.....
but thanks everyone- all your replies have really helped me.
Good luck to anyone else making the same decision!
Jane

 

[DoraT]

I agree with capital that it is really a personal thing. At least the latest research in the US showed the medical world equally split. Hk doctors tend to circumcise boys before 4 years of age because the foreskins do grow a bit until then, making whatever tight prepuce no longer tight. This far, there is no medical literature to unequivocally confirm the protective effect of STD or female cervical cancer (in their sex partners of course).
The only comfort if you elect to inflict the unnecessary harm is that babies don't get to remember who traumatise them at such tender age.

 

[carang]

in this day and age, hygiene shouldn't be a factor... we are lucky to live in a world where it is possible to have showers everyday using soap. if you teach your child HOW to clean it, then there's absolutely no reason he needs to have it done (if that is your reason for doing it).

 

[Koan]

A final point, most women seem to find a circumcised member more aesthetically pleasing, you don't find many dildos looking like uncircumcised penises.

Ummm says who? And with the rapid decrease in circumcision who knows what dildos will look like in the next 10 years anyway.

My husband is uncut. He looks perfect. Hygiene is not an issue. Everybody needs to clean themselves, both men and women, cut and uncut.

 

[jube]

Like several of the replies, I totally agree it's a personal decision that parents need to make.

My husband was circumcised and was pro circumcision. I was initially more inclined not to have my son circumcised, as I thought it would be painful for a baby.

Two things persuaded me to go ahead with the circumcision :

1. Since my husband was circumcised, he had no idea how to look after an uncircumcised penis. Since I had no idea how to look after any penis, I thought he had a point.

2. A friend of mine mentioned that her 2 yo son suffered a urinary tract infection and it was extremely painful for her son. A common friend of ours also had a similar problem in his 20s and said it was the most painful experience of his life. The thought of my uncircumcised son being a little older and having to suffer any pain related to his penis or having to go through circumcision at an age he would feel alot of pain did help persuade me that it would be better to have him circumcised earlier.

In the end, we had our son circumcised at the Matilda on Day 4. He definitely felt pain and definitely was uncomfortable for at least 2 - 3 days afterwards but that was it. It was tough on him and on us as we left the hospital on day 5 and we all had alot of adjustment at home.

We discovered our paediatrician didn't do circumcisions so he recommended another doctor. If you are planning a circumcision, do ask your paediatrician whether he performs circumcisions and if so, how much it is. The doctor that our paediatrician recommended came to the hospital to discuss the procedure and how his method varied from other surgeons. This is something that in retrospect, we should have asked our paediatrician about before the birth and assessed whether or not this was the best method for us. Some methods apparently include a plastic ring/cap being placed on the penis for 2 weeks. Our surgeon only applied a local anaesthetic cream and preferred to perform the surgery in an operating theatre - he felt it was more hygenic - apparently some surgeons just do the circumcision in their surgery.

Another consideration is the cost. The cost of the surgeon plus the operating theatre set us back HK$20,000. THAT was something we had not budgeted for.

I would also suggest discussing with your paediatrician what day is best to perform the surgery - some parents may decide to do the surgery after leaving the hospital, which I think would've worked just as well.

Post surgery our baby was uncomfortable on day 1 & 2 and all we could give him was Calpol, which helped him sleep through it. Our baby also had a little jaundice so was also uncomfortable from that and the 2 combined made the first 2 days at home a little difficult. After that it was fine.

Hope this helps.