i do still believe though that some things like sitting down are not as important as say.... throwing toys at the tv...THAT should be stopped immediately.
walking around during a playgroup is not naughty it is merely being curious. throwing themselves on the floor and screaming their heads off because they are angry is naughty, as far as i'm concerned.
Absolutely.
Sherwes, like Buckaroo I think you need to speak to your helper. It's normal for children to cry, to be unhappy whent they don't get their own way etc. I find that many helpers take the easy way out, which is to give in to the children they are looking after simply to get through the day a little easier! I can understand it but as a parent we need to make sure this happens as little as possible or we will indeed have bratty kids. If she says no, then it's no.
I think it is very important, particularly for boys, to learn
how to express themselves and to be
allowed to express themselves. (girls tend to be better at this naturally.) It is ok to be sad/angry/upset etc. When my boys cry because they haven't gotten their own way I always say things to them like 'i know you are sad/angry but you're not allowed to take other kids toys without asking (for example).' In our house you will also hear me say that I am sad/cross etc when they do something I don't like. Giving them a release and a verbal way to express their frustration really helps as they get older. Since we started doing this at home my 3 year old is like another child. He doesn't need to throw himself on the ground any more as it's far easier to just tell me he's angry. My 20 month old responds very well to this too.
He also hates it if i'm sad so all i have to say is 'i'm sad that you are doing that' and look like i'm going to cry and he immediately stops, says sorry mummy and comes to comfort me.
Hopefully it will mean we raise boys capable of empathy that are aware their actions impact others around them.
Hearing about your childhood brought a memory of my own home. My mother was quite moody and prone to yelling. I distinctly remember that in my whole childhood she only ever apologised to me once for yelling or taking things out on me. It's normal for all of us to lose our tempers from time to time but i think it is really important that we are able to apologise to our children when we do. I often do this and even do it for my husband (daddy is sorry, he didn't mean to get angry). At least then our children will grow up knowing it's ok to make mistakes, lose our temper etc as long as you apologise for them when necessary.
Ahh parenting, such fun!
