Parents giving up adopted child

[sunniefaith]

I read the papers on Sun and am just filled with shock and horror at what some parents can do to an adopted child. Maybe I don't know the truth or their side of the story, but still, I'm just gobsmacked by some people. Maybe I'm feeling this way because we are intending to adopt a child. But whatever it is, adopting a child is more than adopting a dog from the pound. There is just no return policy, especially after a couple of years.

http://www.channelnewsasia.com/stories/afp_asiapacific/view/316715/1/.html

Their story has even made it to Spore.

 

[spockey]

This story originally appeared in the SCMP. It's a European diplomat stationed in HK who gave up the Korean child adopted during his station in Hong Kong.

Whatever the background of the story or reason, a child is NOT a pet and even a pet should NOT be abandoned.

 

[LittlePumpkins]

This is absolutely terrible.

 

[sunniefaith]

Yes! It is terrible! Hope their conscience will eat into them forever!

 

[Ali71]

I find it astounding too, I just hope that all the other options have been explored - my feeling is that the mother is probably suffering from depression, or extreme stress or exhaustion - akin to mothers of babies who lose their bond. I hope that the parents have been fully assessed by medics and that they have all tried counselling too. What I don't understand is how the mother can give her child up after 7 years - to me the need for a genetic bond is irrelevant after 7 years of nurture. What about the future other children let alone the adopted one? Sounds like it's the mother who needs help.
Sadly I believe this case will not help matters for other Western parents seeking to adopt an asian child.
I hope that in a few years we hear of a relatively good ending to this story.

 

[sunniefaith]

I was thinking that it might be post natal depression as well. But what amuses me is this. After years of being with Dutch parents, the child can only speak English and Cantonese. Why can't the child speak Dutch? Isn't it sad that the girl was adopted when the mother that she was sterile and can't have a kid. So now, after having 2 kids of her own, does she then realise that she doesn't want the adopted child now?

I sincerely hope that my speculations are all wrong. Does anyone know the true story behind?

And Ali71, yes, this will definitely have an impact on Western parents who are genuinely seeking to adopt a child. How sad...

 

[Leeah's mom]

it's terrible

I also read about the news.
I think it's terrible..

The poor girl only can speak Cantonese & English so she can't go back to S. Korea , so seeking a family in HK who can take her.
a Few couples tried to take her (American/Korean couple and Chinese/Korean couple in HK) but they couldn't because of the adoption procedure is difficult. I think they got rejected by some conditions.

The thing I don't understand about that dutch diplomat family is why did they leave her in Hong Kong.
I mean they adopted her in KOrean while they are working in Korea, then moved to Hongkong. THen they just leave her to HK government and flew back to their home.
They just abandoned her in HK. The terrible thing is they didn't even apply for the dutch citizenship for her So that girl doesn't have a citizen of Dutch nor korean.
That's the most strange part. I heard she also hasn't got the right to stay in Hongkong.

I just can't understand after raising for 7 years and just abandon the child. I heard they are saying that the girl is not eating their food. that's the reason . I mean they live together for 7 years and she would have adopted to the food and different culture. She was adopted when she was 4 months.

let's just hope she gets a good new family. She is already 7 years old, so she will know that she's abandoned. that's the saddest part.

 

[sunniefaith]

The thing I don't understand about that dutch diplomat family is why did they leave her in Hong Kong.
I mean they adopted her in KOrean while they are working in Korea, then moved to Hongkong. THen they just leave her to HK government and flew back to their home.
They just abandoned her in HK. The terrible thing is they didn't even apply for the dutch citizenship for her So that girl doesn't have a citizen of Dutch nor korean.
That's the most strange part. I heard she also hasn't got the right to stay in Hongkong.

You mean they've already left? This is even more shocking!

 

[Leeah's mom]

yeah

I read other news articles just now (updated one I guess)
It says she was abandoned a year ago and HongKong government takes care of her until now and looking for a new family.
I am not sure whether they actually left HongKong, but they don't care about her definitely. She has been staying at the orphange since ( alomost a year) and attending the local school.
that's why she's speaking cantonese.

She doesn't have the dutch citizenship because they didn't apply for her , but she has the korean citizenship though.

Some say that they got pregnant with their own child in hongkong so that's the reason why they abandoned her.
the Dutch diplomat said " it's a personal matter " and he also insists they had the problem of different culture since she was adopted. "

But the thing is if they had the problem from the start, why didn they do that after 7 years??? 7 years is a very long time. And you know she was only 4 months. I just don't get it!!!!
THey should have considered all those problems before deciding to adopt an asian girl!!

 

[sunniefaith]

I read other news articles just now (updated one I guess)
It says she was abandoned a year ago and HongKong government takes care of her until now and looking for a new family.
I am not sure whether they actually left HongKong, but they don't care about her definitely. She has been staying at the orphange since ( alomost a year) and attending the local school.
that's why she's speaking cantonese.

She doesn't have the dutch citizenship because they didn't apply for her , but she has the korean citizenship though.

Some say that they got pregnant with their own child in hongkong so that's the reason why they abandoned her.
the Dutch diplomat said " it's a personal matter " and he also insists they had the problem of different culture since she was adopted. "

But the thing is if they had the problem from the start, why didn't they do that earlier???? THey should have considered all those problems before deciding to adopt an asian girl!!

Precisely my point! Adopt the child just because they think that they are childless and then give up when their biological kids came along. These people really disgust me! They have been with the kid for like 5 or 6 years and obviously they purposefully spoke English to her only and Dutch amongst themselves because they don't want her to be part of their family. And with food? This is rubbish! I strongly believe that they just gave up the child because they hit a snag in their family life and are not willing to work through it.

I sincerely hope that this little girl will find another nice family and will work out her issues and make her feel love. Poor girl!